Growing Up. A Love-Hate Relationship

So what has been on my mind lately?  Oddly enough, as I sit here typing from Florence Italy, I have been thinking about life after college and what that brings.  Jobs, insurance, a new car, an apartment, benefits…the list of adulthood responsibilities is OVERWHELMING.  I know, this is not something to be worried about now, but fact is, I have been thinking about it a lot.  And that’s that.

In a way though, it is a little bit exciting amidst the tremors.  For the past two years I have felt like everything is so temporary.  San Jose was temporary because it was just my home away from home…where I stayed because I was closer to school.  Here in Italy less so because this is my only home for the entire year, but I still know that come June, I will be going home.  However, as a young adult, I don’t think anything is really that permanent since you don’t really know where your life is going to take you and what it is that you will end up doing and where you will need to move to accommodate that.  I can say that after living in 2 countries, 5 states and 10 houses across the span of my lifetime, I will not spend my entire life living in one area. 

This too, is hard to say, because as the youngest of four sisters I see that growing up does not mean your life will revolve only around you and your desires just because you don’t live with your immediate family anymore.  My sister Amanda is happily married and I am the proud auntie of two nieces and a nephew.  Just in this one year away from home I have realized how special my relationship with each of them is and have had a hard time with the fact that I don’t yet have a relationship with the youngest, Amelia Josephine, who is just seven months old.  Because I grew up across the country from my extended family, I know that it is a possibility to do this and still have a special relationship with them, but I don’t think that is what I want for my relationship with Madelaine, Alasdair and Amelia.

With all this said, there is also the necessity of finding a balance of between living my life for me and living it for other people.  Both important, but how to find the balance will be an experimental process.  All of you from an older generation are probably smiling as you read this thinking, “Yep, she’s gotten to that point in life where she’s thinking about all these things…” but for me it seems like more than just ‘that phase everyone goes through.’

Well, reading this you either got more than you wanted when you clicked on my blog hoping to read exciting news about Italy and European travels, or else you got an added bonus of insight into the thoughts of girl in her twenties, living in Italy, four months away from graduating college and just four months away from ‘real’ adulthood.  Hopefully it was the later.  Thanks for stopping by! (And no, I rarely proofread so thanks for dealing with errors or strangely worded sentences!)